Wednesday 24 December 2014

Thank You 2014

 Two months today I made a life changing decision. I quit my senior position within Sky News and got on a one way plane to Lanzarote. I am now sitting back on a plane on a flight to the UK. This is not me saying I am coming back for good, far from it. In fact I am using this 4 hour flight as a time to reflect. This has made me realise that although I am getting settled from being away from 'home' my real journey is only just beginning. I am merely back for the Christmas and New Year period to see the family and friends I have missed so much over the last couple of months. 
 Leaving the UK has been the best decision I have ever made and somewhat out of character too. I would love to think myself as spontaneous however I do like my home comforts. A beautiful cottage in a village in the English countryside, much like where I grew up, was my ideal life and home. This being far from the lifestyle Lanzarote offers. However, there was a passion and a dream within triathlon far bigger than that life that I had to pursue before my opportunity passed. 'YOLO' (you only live once) being a statement that tragically rings so true through my experience of losing Rosie. I go through life now making decisions on the basis of, "would I regret having not done it later down the line?". My decision to move was one of those moments. I felt at the time I was merely existing in my job and life - far from the idyllic lifestyle I had envisioned. My life now doesn't see me having a 2 bed cottage on the Thames and in driving distance of my loved ones. However,  it does see me living very modestly but very very happy with the simplicity of enjoying like minded peoples' company and taking in some beautiful picture postcard scenery daily. It's safe to say that after the worst year of my life I have found happiness and contentment again and I owe that to Lanzarote. It made me challenge myself and get my fire back. 


Me in the middle of the Tri Yaiza men - can you see why I love their kit?
A friendly ride with Nathan and Bart 

 There is not a single day I do not think of Rosie. She is my driving force, my motivation and my inspiration. If a training run hurts I dig deep and push on harder thinking of her. When my legs scream going up Tabeysco, Rose is there. On a dark starry night, she is who I look for. Rose is with me on every step I take on this journey, wherever it takes me. My recent article in Triathlon Plus explains this.

Triathlon Plus photoshoot

Triathlon Plus photoshoot
 As 2014 comes to a close I also have to reflect on how far I have come in my triathlon journey. I really was not a naturally gifted athlete as a child. Put me amongst all of my school and I assure you I would be one of the last suggested students to have done what I have. But...I have now completed three Ironman's, qualified for Kona in the process and represented my country at the age of 23. Yes I am not a stick thin athlete, never would I want to be. I am not aiming to be pro, my involvement in triathlon is to better myself and to enjoy the ride. I enjoy too many things (wine and cheese mainly) to become a professional. Triathlon gave me a focus when life seemed too unfair. Sport in general is its own form of antidepressant and I would love to help others feel the support I have had.
 I love Lanzarote and owe it so much, however I have found in a short space of time it is a very small island and the community I have become involved in is very small and already tight knit before I rocked up. I have had some criticism for my 'unathletic' appearance (basically not a generic triathlon pin) and chose to look at my training and life in and outside of triathlon but I have learnt to realise that that is their problem and not mine. I want a balance in life and I want to enjoy it. I never got into Tri to be a world class athlete. Maybe it is jealousy as some say because I qualified for Kona but whatever the bitterness is I know I deserve my slot so my advice is stop analysing my achievements and focus on your own. Yes, I didnt have to get a record breaking time in order to get there but that's because I did it whilst I was young when the competition isn't so great. I had the mental strength to do it when I did. So, what's your excuse? Negativity gets people nowhere and if the size of my wine and cheese filled arse is a problem then remark all you like and watch it go to Kona! 



 So 2014 you have been great. I achieved the impossible dream and am now a Kona qualifying athlete. I am not going to lie and say this Christmas is going to be plain sailing and happy. My family have a huge hole missing in Rosie and considering this will be the first Christmas we are all together without her it is going to be tough. We will have laughs however and I know she will be with us in our hearts and thoughts throughout the day, we just need to remember that. Another hole we are going to feel is the lack of my late nan, Joyce. One of the most influential women in my life will be missing for the first Christmas. My fondest memory as a child was Joy turning up with another huge sackful of presents (I'm sure Rosie and I's first bras were in that sack which caused fits of laughter). Nothing will replace our loss but we can only hope they are looking down in pride with a glass in hand. I also know mine is not the only family to feel loss this time of year and my thoughts go to everyone who will feel the loss of a loved one.

Merry Christmas all and a Happy New Year. 2015; I'm ready to see where I'm taken next! 

Monday 8 December 2014

Lanzarote life - a 7 week update

 It has been nearly 7 weeks since I decided to make the life changing move to Lanzarote. The big question is am I still as passionate about making the right decision as I was 4 weeks ago when I posted my last blog? Categorically yes! I have begun to settle in and the normality of living here has started to sink in...well to some extent. I still have to slap myself ocassionally when driving or riding around the amazing and ever changing landscape of Lanzarote. The untouched lava fields still amaze me and the beautiful sunsets and night-time skies are just breathtaking. I am well and truly in love with Lanzarote.

 Aside from staring at suns, stars and moons I have actually done more of what I came out here for; to train. I am currently doing what I call 'base training' whereby I am keeping the mileage up but at no real intensity. There was a week during the horrific storms that it was unsafe to do anything, in fact the Lanzarote Marathon, I was due to partake in, was cancelled due to the red weather warning. However, I didn't feel guilty to myself as after all I have had a long year of racing and still in the fear of having a burn out mentally and physically, however it would be wrong for me to be doing nothing at all. The plan is, come January to increase the intensity to increase my speed but also not to the extent that I peak too soon and mess myself up for the Ironman World Championship in October. Kona is obviously my main focus and the biggest race of my life so I need to make sure I do not ruin it. Many people out here have asked about whether I have a coach (for those who don't know I cut ties with Mark Kleanthous due to financial reasons). Some, including one 2014 Kona completer, shared their woes of over-training particularly considering I am out here with the main intention to train. It is easy to get caught up and feel you should be utilising every second but in fact an injury or burn out from doing too much can have more devastating implications than doing a little less but more efficiently; quality not quantity is true in this case. However, for the time being I am going with the flow and am making a plan regarding races and training by working back from Kona with the aim to peak there. I have many people on this island, athletes who are by far out of my league, who have the knowledge to help me. If I find someone who can offer the support and help I need then I will cross that bridge, but currently I am still pursing the island.

 The other big question people have been asking is "what am I doing out here work wise?". Although my main focus is to train for Kona I do also have to be doing something to keep me ticking over financially. I currently haven't got a full time job however it is early doors and a few little bits are coming together. Aside from training my real desire out here is to create a triathlon accommodation base which is affordable and inclusive. Club La Santa, the seeming haven for triathletes is a big expense for many and actually makes a training week abroad impossible. My goal is to make this available to everyone not just high earners and therefore make an invaluable training week abroad inclusive. Triathlon is a sport full of camraderie and fun and therefore this should be possible in my eyes. I am therefore working with Tiagua 81 in Tiagua - an accommodation base just down the road from where I live. The luxury rooms are an amazing break and the facilities on offer for triathletes is perfect. My aim is to help others get into triathlon and really feel the positive effects of a training week. This is particularly useful for those doing the Ironman out here as they can recce the course, another invaluable trick. I will also be on hand to cycle with and offer all the support and answer any questions any aspiring triathlete, or Ironman may have as well as any the vetran may have.
 As well as this inspiring the next generation of Triathlon is also something I am fiercely passionate about. There will be a time probably not too far off when I will stop racing and the emphasis will be on the children and teenagers of now. Triathlon is a sport growing in popularity and this should be celebrated. Lanzarote have understood and embraced this and it is truly amazing to see the TriActiv Team from Sands Beach really excelling in this. This triathlon club fully believes in the future of triathlon and this is shown by the ever growing amount of juniors on the team. Ex pro Bella Bayliss lives on site at Sands Beach in Costa Teguise and is committed to coaching these youngsters. It is truly amazing to see and something the UK doesn't have. Watching these kids race in the bright tri suits before the Ocean Lava event was truly inspirational. I also have to say, after training with Bella and swimming in the lane next to some of the kids they are going to be a force to be reckoned with!
 So as well as training myself these are my passions on this island and watch this space but things are starting to progress here. Good things come to those who wait.

 So I have covered training, work and future ambitions, I feel I should discuss friends. I mentioned before I struggled occasionally with missing my family and friends. I do get my moments however this separation is all very new to me but yet again I really cannot fault the company out here. Another thing I love about this island is the people who flock here, it really is truly amazing. Everyone who has left their country of origin to live here has a story, much like I do, and it is these stories that inspire me. I love being around these people and learning about their lives. In fact, I was so inspired by one persons journey to the island that it really did help me overcome my worries and chase my own dreams out here. That person happens to be Nathan, my boyfriend. If you have a spare few minutes, after reading mine of course ;), please read his blog - you will understand what I mean! Nathan's blog. Nathan has been awesome welcoming me to the island and his cheffing journey on the island is just starting to take off which is exciting for him. Training for the Ironman together is also an exciting venture we are on together too. Although I owe some influence to him for me being here I also have to thank everyone who has taken me in to Lanzarote. Firstly, thanks to Seb and Nathan for putting up with me, or just about, in your house. Ange you have been an amazing friend to me out here and I can't wait to have more nights out and tasting menu laughs together. Your parents as well, Peter and Sharon, what beautiful people! I also want to thank Maria, Steve and little Aramis at ProBike for just being generally amazing. Nuria, I don't know anyone who has the patience like you with such a smile on your face and all the while looking gorgeous. I appreciate ALL the hours you have spent trying to sort out the backward system in Spain of making me a legal resident! Another special thanks to Mike and Julie Cliffe-Jones, an amazing Triathlon couple on the island (I actually unknowingly ran some of the Ironman Lanzarote marathon with Mike this year) . They together run Lanzarote Inforamtion and kindly invited me to go Go-Karting last week. I look forward to meeting you more and chatting all things Lanzarote and Tri. The crew down at Sands Beach, Juan Carlos, Bella Bayliss, John Beckley, I hope to become more involved with training there particularly with your vision for triathlon. Thanks to the Club La Santa lot, have had a right laugh. Thank you to all those who personally invited me to parties (I really appreciate it and don't know how to say no to one) and to the Lanzarote cricket club guys (and gals) who welcomed me with open arms (probably because I can drink a Budwesier as quick as them - sorry Dad!). The community out here is fantastic and I am so excited to be considered part of it. I feel at home.

Nights out
Go-Karting
 Finally, I just want to reflect briefly on what I have achieved this year. It has probably been one of the most surreal years of my life. When I set out on my mission to qualify for Kona in Rosie's memory it wasn't one I actually believed was possible. It was a goal, even a distraction from my grief. I know now in hindsight I didn't train properly for Ironman Lanzarote - too much pressure? Too much grief? I don't know but I wasn't ready hence my poor performance. I'm big enough to admit now that it wasn't just a bike failure. However, the improvements I can take from this race is mindblowing. The major worry I had for that event was the downhills. I was not confident on a bike at that point (despite having done Ironman Wales). I have crashed going downhill before in 2013 so was scarred from that and the howling crosswinds scared the actual crap out of me. My dad even regaled a story when I was a child whereby I would stop when going downhill and cry my eyes out expressing how scared I was and how much I hated it. Fast-track to now and I LOVE going downhill, I finally understand that it is the reward for climbing and I am now confident enough to go 80km/h downhill. I even have the ability now to beat people, and by people I mean men, whilst going downhill! I admit it's the only time I get cocky and get competitive but if this ability transfers onto climbing I could be on my way to getting a decent time in Kona on the bike. On this note I did the Lanzarote 70.3 route last week at my conservative pace on my road bike with 3 other blokes on TT bikes and didn't look too damn shabby. At the top of Tabaysco I had one say he was impressed - stating 95% of women couldn't do what I just did. I however, shrugged it off as I was embarrassed by hearing the compliment. I'm not meaning to sound arrogant when I write this but I have come a hell of a long way since I did Ironman Lanzarote this year and I'm finally starting to realise it. I never came from a massively sporty background. I could swim relatively well, yes, but I could not cycle and hell I could not run! If you had put me out of my school whole year and asked who would do a marathon first I would be last on the list.
 It has taken me a solid 8 months to realise how far I have come from May this year so forgive me for not being able to put into words the achievement of qualifying for Kona just yet. I am still in disbelief. In fact when in conversation it is never me who says I have qualified, others tell them on my behalf. Some people have said I don't deserve it without knowing my story and that does hurt sometimes but I have begun to learn this week to not give a shit what others say or think. The cruel competitiveness that some decide to ruin the triathlon spirit is not what I got in it for and thankfully they are the minority. When my achievement of getting to Kona really sinks in I will blog about it but for now it's still the impossible dream I made possible because I had the will, the motivation, the inspiration and tenacity to chase something people do only dream about.
 All of this was discussed on long rides with the amazing Amy Kilpin who came out for a training week last week. We were inseperable and had many DMC's (Deep Meaningful Conversations) throughout. It was amazing to see her and amazing to think we also met via triathlon on Twitter. I truly believe everything happens for a reason as she is a friend for life. There are not many people you can meet and feel comfortable with in minutes. We cycled, we ran, we swam, we drank, we danced and we laughed A LOT. I can only thank her for the support, I didn't know how much I needed some girl time. I can't wait for both of our chapter's in 2015!

Thank you Lanzarote. Hollie is back and I AM COMING KONA!